Sick, snot and shut up.

I love my kids, I do, they are the best thing I've ever done. But fuck me sideways, if I have to hear Miss G whinge and whine for one more day, I'll be be writing this blog live from Cell Block C. Then again, it's only illegal if you get caught yeah?

I understand she is sick, and tired and grumpy, but please shut up. When I'm sick all I want to do is sleep, curl up in bed smothered in Vicks, maybe read. I don't want to ride my noisy plastic pink trike up and down the hallway, up and down, up and fucking down, (which of course wakes the baby, what 7 month old needs sleep? clearly not this one), then suddenly whinge that I'm tired can you push me, I can't move, I can't do it. You were just doing it for 20 fucking minutes, you ran over my toes twice and I have scuff marks on the goddamn walls.
No I'm not carrying you to the toilet, or feeding you, no you can't have lollies because they make you better, yes I am mean for saying no, hell no you are not watching The Wiggles again, and no I will not go away, but you can, feel free.

Did you know I hate snot? I can handle vomit, shit running down the legs and smooshed up the back, I can handle blood and gaping wounds and sticking my thumb up my baby's ass to help her shit, but snot? Just no. Makes my gut churn.
You know the type I'm talking about - running out of the nose, over the lips, then into the mouth when they open it to most likely whinge more crap at you expecting you to ask how high when they say jump; it bubbles when they breathe and for some fucked up reason kids think it's an unnamed food group and lick it up like it's ice cream. *gags* kids are feral, but that's a whole other blog.
My point was - I have had 2 of these freaks for almost a week. Miss G won't take her finger out of her nose, or use a tissue (why when she has clothing, or me), and Miss O keeps rubbing her evil snot into her hair, which I then kiss when I'm reminded that she can't talk, or whinge.

I'm about to go wrestle Miss G into a shower and put her whining grumpy ass to bed. If I have to tie her scrawny ass down so be it, mum needs a fucking beer.